24Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor
Introduction:
Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor
Chapter Twenty-Four: Grime and Punishment
Disclaimer: Not mine, I own nothing. Iâm not making any money.
WARNING: Harsh Language, adult themes, sexual situations (i.e. smut), bad spelling and grammar.
Authorâs Notes: This story is a broad farce with over the top humor (a good deal of it is crude and sexual) and OOC actions (thatâs Out Of Character if you donât know). Also, this is my first smut-ish fic. If you donât like sex and sex-based humor, do NOT read this!
Chapter Twenty-Four: Snape reveals the truth that everybody already knew.
âWhatâs he doing here?â Ron spat through clenched teeth.
Harryâs blood was boiling with rage as he watched the man who had betrayed and murdered Dumbledore walking just a few feet away. Harry wanted to rush up to Snape and hex the traitorous bastard into oblivion.
Before he could react, Harry saw Snape pull a small knife out of his pocket. He watched as Snape cut open his own hand, much like Harry had done shortly before. The greasy git wiped his hand, smearing his blood onto the hidden doorway. The young wizard watched in bewilderment as the door magically appeared, and Snape vanished into the hidden hallway.
âWhat dâyou think heâs doing?â asked Ron, in a more confused than normal tone.
âMaybe he is checking on the Horcruxes for You Know Who,â suggested Luna.
âWhy would he?âreturned Hermione. âVoldemortâs never checked on his Horcruxes before. Why should he start now? Unless⊠unless Voldemort has figured out weâre destroying them and heâs having his minions check on the remaining ones! But why would he send one of his followers to do it? This could be bad,â the brunetteâs voice grew worried. âOh, no. What if Voldemort found out what weâre doing and is using his minions to move all of the Horcruxes to a more secure location?â
âWell if that does happen, all you have to do is rub another one out of Harry and track them down again,â Ron offered off-handedly.
âRonald, donât use such crude language,â chastised Luna. ââRub one out,â how low. The correct phrase is âwank him off.â And you forgot to add âand take it in the face.â Thatâs the proper language for this situation. I thought you knew better than that.â
âWhat are we going to do, Harry?â Hermione asked, clearly trying to ignore Luna and Ronâs exchange.
âWe capture him, thatâs what,â Harry said flatly.
The three friends stared at Harry for a full two seconds before Ron stated in an overly sarcastic way; âOh, just capture him. That should be easy. Bloody easy I should say.â
âHarry, Snape is an experienced duelist and a master Legilimens,âinformed Hermione. âHeâd take us out with little effort. The four of us wouldnât be much of a challenge, even allowing for both of our power boosts. Heâd be able to see our moves through his Legilimency and block them or even stop us before we finished our incantations.â
âIf we play our cards right, we wonât have to duel him,â Harry said as a sly grin stretched across his face. For the first time since Snape appeared, Harry turned and faced his friends. âWe set some traps and snatch him. Hermione and Luna, you two know more traps than Ron and I do. Lay as many traps right outside the door as you can. Leg-Lockers, Binding Jinxes, Disarming Traps, anything you can think up.â
âDo you think thatâll work?â asked Luna.
âWhy not?â returned Harry. âFor all Snape knows, heâs disarmed the traps outside the exit. He wonât be expecting any new ones when he comes out.â
Without another word, Luna and Hermione dashed toward the hidden entrance and immediately began twirling their wands about, casting trap after trap on the area just outside the door. Every few seconds one witch would suggest a trap to cast to the other; âTry Finneganâs Folly right thereâor âHow about Carmenâs Bumbler, itâs an oldie but goodyâ to name a few. As the two witches worked as quickly as they could, Ron and Harry had their wands out and leveled at the door, ready to launch hexes and jinxes in case Snape were to come out while their witches incanted.
A few minutes later, Hermione and Luna, satisfied that enough traps were laid, rejoined Harry and Ron in the shadows across the street. All four stared at the invisible door in silence, almost willing Snape to come out so they could capture him. Thankfully, the teensâ patience was not tried too much.
The door popped into existence less than a minute after Hermione and Luna had completed their task. Harry could almost hear the old hinges of the door creak from across the street as it slowly opened. A sour and disappointed looking Snape was framed in the dark doorway. He glanced to his left and then to the right, sneering at the empty space in front of him. Satisfied that no one was watching, the Potions Master stepped out of the doorway. The moment his foot touched the ground outside the door a loud bang echoed through the air.
Two things happened at the exact same time. First; Snapeâs feet were tugged backward, as if an invisible rope had pulled violently on the limbs; making the surly wizard pitch forward. Second, Snapeâs wand sprung from his hand and soared through the air. It clattered on the ground a dozen feet away from the greasy wizard.
As Snape continued to pitch forward, he tried to break his fall by placing his hands in front of him. This attempted act of self-preservation only triggered two of Hermioneâs and Lunaâs traps. A Body Bind hex caused Snapeâs limbs to snap together while Levicorpus hoisted the wizard into the air by his ankles.
A victorious smile appeared on Harryâs face.
âWe did it!âcheered Hermione.
âYou doubted my plan?â the bespectacled wizard said with a false air of disapproval.
âOh, will you ever forgive me for my transgressions?â returned Hermione with an equal helping of irony.
As the four friends moved in a group to the immobile and inverted villain, Ron added to Harryâs and Hermioneâs interchange. And Ron, being Ron of course, missed his friendsâ tone and spoke with sincerity. âOf course we beat him. We knocked his arseout in our third year, remember? And all we used was just an Expelliarmus; a simple charm we learned in our second year.â
A few feet away from their dangling detainee, Ron gasped, as if an epiphany came to him. âHey, wouldnât it be cool if you defeated You Know Who with an Expelliarmus, Harry.â
âDonât be asinine, Ron,â Hermione glared at Ron the way an instructor stares at a lovable dim-witted child. âVoldemortâs the most feared and powerful dark wizard in a century. A simple Expelliarmus canât defeat him. It is a disarming charm; it doesnât really do much to an opponent if one is able to think on their feet.â
âBut, what if-â he began to defend himself.
âRonald, Hermione is right,â Luna said softly and kindly⊠like the way an instructor speaks compassionately to a lovable dim-witted student. âTo even think that such a childish spell could defeat someone like You Know Who is just plain dumb, my love.â
Ronâs shoulders slumped in defeat. Feeling sorry for his best mate, Harry patted the red haired wizard on the back. âIf my life wasnât in mortal danger during aduel with the most powerful and feared wizard of our times, I would definitely try to cast an Expelliarmus on him, Ron.â
âThanks, Harry,âRon smiled.
Turning his attention away from his lovable dim-witted friend, Harry stared angrily at his former potions professor.
âLooks like justice will have its day, you bastard,â Harry threatened.
Snapeâs fathomless black eyes narrowed on Harryâs. Harry knew that the git was using Legamcyto probe his thoughts, but the young wizard didnât care. In a few moments, heâd bodily haul Snape to the Ministry so they could chuck his arse in Azkaban.
âYou destroyed theHorcrux,â stated Snape.
âYeah, I did,â the raven haired wizard said in a dismissive manner. âAnd a few of the others as well. Your masterâs time is running short,â he finished boldly.
âWait, you found the cup?â Snape asked.
âYep, found and destroyed. Including the diary, ring, and the anvil, that means Voldemort is down four Horcruxes,â Harry gloated.
âHow did you find them so quickly?â the greasy wizard demanded.
âA simple searching ritual,â he answered proudly.
âThe Dark Lord has dozens of wards against any form of magical searching,â Snape argued. âHow could a wizard as feeble as you bypass them?â
âI have my ways,âHarry said and his mind drifted back to the wonderful han â err â ritual that he and Hermione performed. Which was a mistake.
Snapeâs eyes bulged and he began looking between Harry and Hermione in disbelief. It was at that moment that Harry made amental note not to recall intimate moments in front of a master Legilimens.
Again, Snapeâs eyes narrowed on Harry. âI thought you looked at Granger like she was your sister,â the villain said with clear disgust.
âMy âsisterâ?â Harry shot back with mirrored revulsion. âHow the hell would you think that?â
âIt was an impression I got,â answered Snape. âI assumed that you felt that she was nothing more than a sister to you. It is obvious to me that ishow you acted in regards to your feelings for Granger.â
âHow I acted? Iâm an only bloody child. How the fuck would I know what having asister felt like?â retorted Harry. âSo, how could I have acted like I felt that Hermione was a sister? That makes no sense at all. Not once since I met Hermione have I ever thought of her as a sister, not even in passing. So it wouldâve been an uneducated assumption on your part to conclude that I had brotherly feelings for her. As a best friend, yes; as a sister, no! Besides, if I thought of anyone like asibling it wouldâve been Ron. And thatâs only because I looked at Mrs. Weasley as a surrogate mother; especially after the fiasco that was the Third Task of the Tri-Wizard.â
For some inexplicable reason, Hermione snorted a chuckle.
âWhat?â Harry turned, asking his girlfriend.
âOh, nothing,â she said. The twinkle in her eyes told Harry it was indeed something. But before he could press the issue, a thought occurred to him; something just a little bit more important than finding out why Hermione laughed.
âWait. Howâd you know about the Horcruxes anyway?âhe demanded of Snape. âI thought Voldemort wouldâve never told anyone about them.â
âJust as slow as ever, Potter,â Snape said snidely. âAsk yourself why would the Dark Lord willingly divulge such a vulnerability?â
âI just asked you that,â Harry snapped. âYou canât ask me my own question back. Youâre the prisoner and Iâm the one who captured you. Itâs not proper.â
Snape smiled his greasy, crooked tooth smile in response.
âI can hex you, you know,â threatened Harry while waving his wand in front of Snapeâs hooked nose.
âBecause Voldemort didnât,â Hermione answered Snapeâs question. âAt least, not knowingly.â
Harry turned and faced Hermione once again. The witch had an expression somewhere between understanding and confusion. As if what she had said had seemed clear but had brought up a bevy of other questions.
âAh, I can practically hear the gears turning in your puny little minds,â mocked Snape. It infuriated Harry that even though Snape was bound and defenseless, he still seemed to have the upper hand.
âI say we disregard his motivation and just drag his bottom to the Ministry,â Luna threatened, although her tone wasnât very intimidating; the way she spoke sounded like she was offering to bake biscuits and share them with the potions master.
âI agree with Luna,â Ron said. He glowered at Snape before turning to his wife and whispering in her ear, âDonât use the word âbottomâ when threatening someone. It ruins the effect.â
âYouâre⊠youâre working against him?â speculated Harry.
âVery good, Potter. It seems the Headmasterâs faith in you wasnât completely wasted,â Snape said scornfully.
âI think heâs still lying,â Ron snapped. âHeâs just playing us. Trying to distract us so he can escape.â
âYes, youâve discovered my brilliant plan, Weasley,â the greasy wizard glared at Ron.
âYou killed Dumbledore. I saw it with my own eyes,âHarry snarled. âWhy should I believe you when you say youâre working against Voldemort?â
âI have a vial of Veritaserum in my left robe pocket,â the greasy gitstated. âFeed me three drops, and youâll know I am speaking the truth.â
âItâs a colorless and odorless potion, how the hell can we tell if itâs Veritaserum and not just water?â demanded Hermione.
âI still fail to see why so many people consider you a brilliant witch, I have always known you to be just slightly above average for a Gryffindor, which is not saying much,â Snape said. âA child could tell you that you can easily verify the potion by using it on one of yourselves, and then ask something that the test subject wouldnât normally reveal.â
âWhat if itâs apoison?â Luna asked. âIf one of us takes it, we could die.â
âAnd how would killing one of you dolts be helpful to me? If it was a poison, I wouldâve suggested that all four of you take it, not just one,â the former Head of Slytherin snapped. âIf it was a poison and I did trick one of you into taking it, Iâd still have to deal with the other three. And in my current predicament, frozen, dangling upside-down in mid-air without a wand, the three of you, despite your lowly skills, would make short work of me. What good would it do if I poisoned only one of you?â
The four friends shared a look. Harry was hesitant, what he really wanted to do was drag the son of a bitch down to the Ministry so that they could chuck him into Azkaban. But apart of the young wizard was wondering if Snape was telling the truth; what if he truly was working on bringing Voldemort down? What if Snape was still a spy for the light?
âIâll do it,â Ron offered, his voice hesitant and soft. âIâll test the potion.â
âAre you sure?âasked Harry.
âYeah,â Ron replied and took a step toward Snape. âUm, how about we make a Portkey to St. Mangoâs, just in case it is a poison, though?â
Luna toed off one of her shoes. Bending over at the hips, she tapped her wand against her discarded shoe and incanted, âPortus.â
As the shoe trembled and glowed, Ron stood in front of Snape.
âThe vial is in my front left pocket,â the captured wizard said.
While Ron dug around in Snapeâs robes, Harry asked his former instructor âYou always keep avial of Veritaserum on you?â
âYes, among anumber of other potions, including several antidotes,â Snape stated arrogantly. âI find it best, unlike others whom I wonât mention,â he glared directly at Harry, âto be prepared.â
Finally, Ron tugged a small glass vial out of Snapeâs robes.
âPut three drops on your tongue, Weasley,â the Potions Master commanded.
Uncorking the tiny bottle, Ron nervously asked Luna âIs that Portkeyready?â
âYes, Ronald,âreplied Luna. Her eyes were wide(well⊠wider than normal) with anxious worry.
The red haired wizard opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue. With a steady hand, Ron tilted the vial and cautiously dropped three dollops of the liquid on his tongue. He swallowed, placed the stopper back in the vial, turned to face his friends and said âI donât think it wor-â
Thatâs when Ronâs expression went blank. His eyes glazed over and his mouth hung open and slack jawed.
Out of the corner of Harryâs eye, he saw Luna run her hands over the front of her robes. He askedâWhat are you doing, Luna?â
âChecking to see if my breasts are exposed,â the blonde witch answered lightly. âRonald gets that same expression whenever he sees my breasts. I was worried that they had popped out accidentally. They do that sometimes, you know.â
âReally, his expression changed?â Hermione asked no-one in particular under her breath. âI canât tell. He looks like he always does to me.â
âItâs the Veritaserum, you fools,â Snape spoke slowly, as if Harry and his friends had difficulty understanding such a basic concept. âAsk Weasley your questions so you can verify the potion.â
âOkay, Ron, tell us something you donât want us to know,â Harry asked. If the potion truly was Veritaserum, Ron would answer truthfully.
In a daze, Ron stated âI really liked it when Luna stuck her finger into my bottom.â
Harry, Hermione, and Snape balked at Ronâs admission while Luna giggled happily.
âSo much so that Iwant her to do it again,â the red haired wizard continued, unfortunately. This caused the three who balked to take astep back â which was rather difficult for Snape seeing that he was bound in place and hanging upside-down. But Luna only seemed encouraged. In fact, Harry assumed by the eager look in her eyes that she was willing to acquiesce to Ronâs request right there in the alleyway. And knowing her past history, such an event was a definite possibility. Harryâs assumption was confirmed when the blonde witch held up her index finger and began to wiggle it about. âI know I acted shocked and hurt when she did it that one time,â Ron forged ahead. âBut really, I was just surprised at how much I liked it, to be honest.â
âUm, thatâs enough Ron, we know itâs Veritaserum. You can stop,â Harry implored almost desperately. He was terrified that Luna, encouraged by her husbandâs revelation would bound over to Ron and jab one of her digits up his bum. Not wanting to see that, he begged Ron. âPlease, stop.â
âIn fact, Iâm hoping sheâll use two fingers next time,â Ron added.
âStupefy!â Hermione cried out frantically. A bolt of red magic leapt from her wand and struck Ron, squarely in the chest. The gangly wizard collapsed to the ground unconscious.
âHermione, I wonât be able to fulfill Ronaldâs wishes if he isnât awake,â Luna said in her usual dreamy tone. With her left hand she caressed her right index finger, as if warming it up for the nefarious purpose.
âThat was the point,â Hermione said with a desperate edge to her voice.
âWell, I suppose Icould still do my wifely duties, even if he is unconscious,â the blonde said, taking a step toward her unconscious husband.
Hermione pointed her wand at Luna and warned, âDonât make me use this on you.â
With the brunetteâs wand leveled at her head, Luna took a step back, albeit clearly disappointed.
âIf I still held my position as professor at Hogwarts, I mightâve considered giving Gryffindor points for your actions, Granger,â Snape said to the brunette witch and then reiterated; âMight have.â
âAll right, letâs get this over with,â Harry said.
Hermione nodded and walked over to Ron. While she picked up the vial of Veritaserum Harry waved his wand at Snape. The Potions Master slowly pivoted in air, turning right side up.
âOpen your mouth,âHermione, whose voice showed no sympathy for the magically bound wizard, commanded. Snape opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue as far as it could go. Even with this contortion of his features, the gitstill looked like he was sneering at Harry.
Carefully, Hermione measured out three drops of Veritaserum onto Snapeâs tongue. He swallowed and a second later his face went blank much like Ronâs had.
Knowing that the Veritaserum would make Snape answer nothing but the truth, Harry asked âWhy are you here?â
âI am on a mission to retrieve the Dark Lordâs Horcruxes so that they can be destroyed and he can be finally defeated,â Snape spoke in a flat and emotionless tone.
âWho gave you this mission?â asked Harry.
âHeadmaster Dumbledore,â he replied. âDue to the injuries he received when he destroyed the ring-Horcruxand his advanced age, the Headmaster was dying. Dying painfully. He had come up with the plan for me to carry out Dracoâs mission of killing him for the Dark Lord. That way Iâd save Draco from any evil act⊠well, murder at any rate. And Iâd show agreat man who was suffering immensely mercy. My actions would also entrench myself in the Dark Lordâs ranks. The Dark Lord would herald me for killing his hated enemy. He would reward me by making me his most trusted servant. And with that trust, I would be able to gather information on the whereabouts of his Horcruxes.â
âHowâd you do that?â inquired Harry. âI donât imagine heâd ever divulge the secret to his immortality to anyone.â
âI am a Potion Master,â he answered. If it wasnât for the effects of the Veritaserum making him speak in a monotone, Harry was positive that Snape would have been overly arrogant and degrading to the younger wizard. âI used a combination of Sleeping Draughts and Veritaserum to pry the information out of him as he slumbered. If he had remembered divulging any of his secrets, which was unlikely, it wouldâve seemed like he had done so in a dream.â
Recalling the missing Horcrux, the one they couldnât find through the han â err â ritual, Harry asked âHow many locations have you gotten?â
âJust this one, Gryffindorâs useless wizarding anvil,â Snape replied. âIâve had to work slowly, only taking small pieces of information from the Dark Lord, asking about traps and wards along with the location, night by night. I feared that to ask more than one question a night would alert him to my mission, and Iâd be killed.â
Harry cursed silently. At this rate, heâd never find the missing Horcrux.
Pushing that depressing revelation to the side, Harry returned his thoughts to Snape. The git was telling the truth, he was still working for the light. The bespectacled wizard was still angry that Snape had killed Dumbledore, despite the fact that it was an act of mercy that Dumbledore had not only welcomed but encouraged. Then aquestion came to Harry; why was Snape working for the light? As far as Harry knew, Snape was a bigot and pure blood elitist even though he himself was of mixed heritage. Curiosity got the better of the young wizard and he asked, âWhy did you join the Order?â
âI am in love with your mother,â was his answer. âEven to this day.â
Harry was floored. Snape betrayed his master out of love. And love for Harryâs own mother. Yet, Harry recalled how Snape had cruelly called Lily a Mudblood in the Pensivememory. How could he have called her such a foul name if he was in love with her?
âEven though she was a mudblood, I still masturbate ferociously to her memory,â Snape continued.
At that moment, Harry lost control of his bladder. The concept of Snape pleasuring himself over anything was highly disturbing. The fact that greasy git was doing so to the memory of Harryâs mother made it downright terrifying for the young wizard. As his warm urine flowed down his trousers, he noticed out of the corner of his eyes that Hermioneâs complexion had gone asickly green, and Luna had blanched and held her hands in front of her mouth, apparently to stop the vomit from erupting from her lips. They too were just as disturbed by Snapeâs admission.
âIt is truly disgusting just how often I abuse myself with the thought of Lily, even now, but particularly when I was still a student,â Snape forged ahead. âBy my seventh year, my right forearm was twice the size of my left.â
Silently, Harry begged Hermione to stun Snape like she had done to Ron, because fear had paralyzed Harry and he couldnât do it himself. Unfortunately, the same fear that had rendered Harry a statue had claimed Hermione as well.
âIn my third year, I cut holes in the pockets of my robes,â the elder wizard regrettably persistent. âWhenever Lily spoke to someone⊠Iconstantly followed her, lurking in the shadows just to hear the mudbloodâs angelic voice as she talked with the other students⊠I would discreetly slip my hands through those holes and fondle myself. Just the sound of her sweet voice was enough to get me hard as steel. I had gotten so skilled at defiling myself under my robes that I could carry on a conversation with another student while that gorgeous mudblood red-head had her own private discussion. I could pleasure myself, with no one the wiser. Many, many times did I ejaculate in my own shorts while imagining actually speaking to her, be it about schoolwork, the weather, politics, or whatever other topics came up.
âOne time, while Lily was studying in the Library, she had turned her back and, seeing my chance, I slinked out of the nearby dark alcove where I was hiding and defiling myself â which I did often â and nicked her Charmâs notes. That night I stripped naked and rubbed her delicious parchment all over my bare and sensitive flesh. The words she had written danced over my taught nipples. In a way, I was cleansing myself with her essence when I did that. That night, that wondrously glorious night, I came so much that I lost consciousness,â Snape spoke. âWhen I anonymously returned her notes, I heard Lily asking her friends how the recovered parchment could have gotten so badly crumpled. I fantasized that if I ever had the nerve to talk to that wondrous mudblood, I could tell her the truth and that she would see how much I loved her and in turn she would do her duty as a non-pureblood and fall madly in love with me. I dreamt about bending her over a table and slapping my manhood against the milky white flesh of her buttocks.â
Just when Harry thought it couldnât get worse, Snape uttered sixteen disgusting words. On their own, these sixteen words were far from revolting. But strung together and said by Snape in reference to Harryâs mother was what made it truly horrible:
âI often imagine what Lilyâs beautiful green eyes would look like framed with my white seed.â
Thankfully one of Harryâs limbs broke free of the paralyzing fear at that moment. And even more satisfying, it wasnât his wand-arm. Instead, his right leg sprung up and kicked his heel directly into Snapeâs groin. It was as if a part of Harry was subconsciously punishing Snape for thinking of his mother in such a disgusting manner.
If Snape had not been under the effects of a Body Bind, he would no doubt have ended up on the ground of the alley, curled up in a tight ball. Having been denied the privilege of doubling up into the fetal position, all the wizard could do was roll his eyes into his skull. A high pitch whine, like steam escaping from a kettle, sounded from Snapeâs thin and crooked lips.
âKick him again,âHermione prayed in a small voice. Luna, still pressing her hands against her mouth, nodded her head passionately in agreement.
âI deserved that,âSnape groaned out, his voice still a note higher than normal. Harry took solace in the fact that the dirty pervert who stalked his mother even after her death was still under the effects of Veritaserum which meant that what he said was true and he did deserved to be kicked. Of course, even if Snape had not made this statement, Harry wouldâve still felt justified in his actions.
For the next few minutes, Harry fought the urge to give into Hermioneâs suggestion and beat Snape into a pulp; particularly around the groin region. Harry knew that he would feel better if Snape was bruised and bloodied; especially around the groin. He paced back and forth in front of the bound wizard, every now and again, Harryâs leg twitched, aching to kick the stalker, mainly around the crotch. But the disgusting perverted stalker was helping to bring down Voldemort. And since he was one of Voldemortâs trusted lieutenants, Harry could use him; not only to help find the missing Horcrux, but to gain relevant information on Voldemort and his followers. So, unfortunately, Harry came to conclusion not to beat Snape to within an inch (mainly on and around the groin region) of his life for the greater good.
After Harry canceled the Body Bind, Snape fell to his knees and vomited on the ground. While Snape tried to regain his composure, Harry asked Hermione to revive Ron.
Snape stood and locked eyes with Harry. Judging by his lack of a dazed expression, Harry assumed that the effects of the truth potion had worn off. There in the black pits of his eyes, Harry could see that Snape still loathed him, probably even more now that Harry knew his secrets. But underneath the abhorrence was a hint of compliance; Snape knew he had to team up with Harry in order to bring down Voldemort.
âI can assume you know the locations of the other Horcruxes through that⊠ritual?â Snape asked in an even tone.
âOne of them yes,âHarry replied. âSlytherinâs locket is with a bloke named Zardoz. He lives at a place called Foundersâ Cove.â
âIâm familiar with him,â the elder wizard stated.
âI know about Voldemort, but heâs under the Fidelius and I canât track him down,â continued Harry. âThere is one other Horcrux, but I canât find it for some reason.â
The potion master became lost in thought for a moment. Then, after some silent consideration, Snape spoke âI will deal with Zardoz.â
âWe can do it!âsnapped Harry; offended that Snape didnât think he could get the Horcrux away from its current owner.
âI can retrieve the item with subtlety and tack,â Snape said contentiously.
âAnd we canât?âHermione heatedly returned.
âDid you not notice that you left a fifty foot corpse of a mutilated Basilisk back in that chamber?âSnape asked rhetorically. âBecause if you consider that to be tactful or subtle then you have more to learn than Ihad thought.
âWhat were you planning on doing? Asking Zardoz to hand the locket over? From what Iâve heard about the man tells me that he would never part with such a prized possession,â Snape jeered. âI can take the Horcruxright out from under his nose and Zardoz would never know.â
âYou wonât hurt him will you?â asked Harry. He hated to admit it, but Snape was a damn good spy and could probably do what he had just boasted. And if Snape was able to deal with Zardoz and the locket, it would be a weight off of Harryâs shoulders.
âOf course Iwonât,â Snape replied angrily. âYou and your girlfriend can busy yourselves with finding the missing Horcrux.â
Apparently satisfied that the conversation was over, Snape swirled his black robes around in a theatrical manner before Apparating away with acrack.
âWhat a wanker,â insulted Ron.
Referring to Snape as a âwankerâ was clearly too much for Luna. With Ronâs comment, the blonde witch was obviously reminded about Snapeâs revelation of masturbating habitually, causing Luna to lose control. With a loud gurgling and splashing sound, Luna emptied the contents of her stomach down the front of Ron. Her vomit splashed and flowed down his belly, groin, and legs, pooling around his feet and in his shoes.
âUm, did I miss something?â a bewildered Ron asked looking at the great globs of partially digested food and bile dribbling down his trousers.
âJust be thankful you did,â Harry said with a frown, trying to erase the memory of what Snape had said from his mind.
*
After cleaning up and returning to the castle, the four friends ate dinner. Actually, Ron ate all four of the dinners while Harry, Hermione, and Luna, having lost their appetites thanks to Snape, didnât eat.
As Ron reached across the table to steal some food from Hermioneâs plate, Harry looked across the Hall at a sixth-year Ravenclaw. The younger wizard smiled directly at Harry and gave him a thumbs-up signal. The nameless wizard then mouthed the words âThanks, mateâ (that or âLetâs date,â Harry was hoping for the former).
âWhatâs he on about?â asked Harry.
Glancing up from her now-barren plate, Hermione asked, âWho?â
âSome bloke over there,â he pointed in the Ravenclaw tableâs general direction. âHe just smiled at me and gave me a âthumbs upâ. Like I did something to be proud of or something.â
âEverybodyâs acting strange lately,â commented Hermione. âWhen we first walked in here, a couple of witches from Hufflepuff blushed and then winked at me.â
âIt is the SpottedWollcockâs mating season,â Luna offered and left it at that, assuming that everyone knew what it implied.
Ignoring the peculiar actions of his peers as well as Lunaâs bizarre explanation, Harry returned to watching Ron eat everyoneâs dinner.
*
Thankfully, by the next day, the shock of Snapeâs seemingly favorite hobby had worn off and Harry, Hermione, and Luna were able to eat once again. Of course even with their renewed appetites, Ron still nicked food off of their plates.
That night, as they were preparing for a quiet night in bed, Hermione broached a subject. She said; âThat was very nice what you said about Molly: how you think of her as a mother. Iâm sure sheâd be tickled pink to hear that.â
âYeah,â Harry said with a genuine smile. He imagined Mrs. Weasley gushing happily and pulling Harry into a rib-breaking hug.
âAnd I know that Ron isnât very expressive, but Iâm sure heâs proud that you look at him as abrother,â Hermione continued, slipping on her silk pajamas.
Then, an overly confused expression appeared on her face, she was undoubtedly forcing it for effect. Tapping her finger on her chin thoughtfully, Hermione turned to Harry, as he was tugging the bed sheets down to crawl into bed, and asked; âTell me Harry; if Mollyâs like a mother and Ronâs a brother, what does that make Ginny to you?â
âWhat are you getting at?â Harry asked, dubious of his girlfriendâs intentions.
âWell, Ginny is Mollyâs daughter. And sheâs Ronâs sister,â Hermione said thoughtfully. âSince you look at those two as mother and brother⊠wouldnât that make Ginny asister?â
A wicked, nay downright evil grin popped up on Hermioneâs face.
âYou snogged a girl whoâs like asister,â she said devilishly. âAnd you felt her tits⊠devoid of any substance that most would consider breasts, but you felt up the flat-chested bintwhoâs like a sister none the less!â
With an odd and uncharacteristic calmness, Harry waited for Hermioneâs joke to end. Normally, Harry wouldâve been revolted at such an issue. But a naughty thought of his own occurred to him and he was waiting for Hermione to finish so he could act upon it.
Clearly disappointed that Harry was not reacting like he normally did (i.e. screaming, turning green, and so on), Hermione decided to twist the proverbial knife to get a response out of him. âNot only is she like a sister, but she looks like your mother! Is incest really that appealing to you, Harry? It must be since Ginny, the girl you kissed and fondled, is the virtual epitome of incest for you.â
âAre you finished?â he asked coolly.
âYouâre no fun,âshe pouted, disappointed that Harry wasnât nearly in tears.
Harry took his cue and leapt onto the bed. Deftly, he tumbled across the mattress, sat on the edge, and grabbed Hermione around her waist. Before she could even flinch, he tossed her over his lap and smacked her round bottom hard. Hermione yelped in a combination of pain, surprise and arousal.
âBad, naughty little witch for toying with me like that,â Harry scolded and spanked her through her pajamas again.
âOW!â she half cried, half cheered.
âYou shouldnât mock me like that,â he said and tugged her pajama bottoms down, exposing her knickers-covered bum. Harry hooked his thumb under the left edge of her knickers and his index finger under the right. He pulled his fingers into a fist, causing the cotton unmentionables into a thin band. Next, Harry pulled on the band, wedging the fabric between Hermioneâs round cheeks. The witch groaned out loudly as her knickers tugged against her sensitive flower.
âNaughty little witches like you need to be punished,â Harry said with a broad grin. âDonât they?â
While still tugging her knickers up, Harry used his free hand and slapped her bare right cheek.
âI asked the naughty little witch a question,â Harry said. âDonât bad little witches like you need to be punished?â
âOh, hell yes,âshe hissed out. âSpank my mischievous bottom.â
Harry proceeded to slap each cheek in turn with a rapid series of light smacks. While spanking one cheek, Harry watched entranced as the other jiggled from the blow.
Once the witch had a nice even pink hue to her skin, Harry increased the strength and speed of his blows. In no matter of time, Hermione was cheering; âOW! YES! OW! HARDER! OW! MORE!â
After a good full three minutes, Harry paused. He massaged her red and welt-covered bum while he spoke. âA naughty little witch who says vile things about her boyfriend needs to be punished. I should spank your bottom âtil you learn your lesson.â
âOh, Merlin, yes,âshe breathed out. âPlease make me learn my lesson.â
He pulled her knickers, which were visibly damp from where they had rubbed against her flower, halfway down her thighs. Now that his hand wasnât holding Hermioneâs knickers in place, Harry was free to use both hands to paddle his loverâs bottom. Almost immediately, his hands fell into a rhythm. The instant one hand left her skin, the other smacked her round bottom. He marveled at the sight of her glowing bum as it bounced and jiggled wildly due to the blows. It looked like the sea during a storm.
Hermione was so excited that she was hissing short, rapid breaths in and out through gritted teeth. Also, Harry could feel her love juices trickling down his leg and staining the sheets.
A few minutes later, Hermioneâs bottom took on the appearance of a smooth, polished, and very red ruby.
âOh, God, Harry; Iwant you,â she groaned out. Her voice was husky with lust.
Even though âHarry, Jr.â was more than willing to take the task, the organ was painfully hard, Harry wanted to toy with Hermione a bit longer.
âNaughty little witches often donât get what they want,â he said with mirth.
âWHAT?â Hermioneâs head snapped back and she stared daggers at him for his defiance.
Looking directly at her spiteful stare with a wicked twinkle in his eyes, Harry gave Hermione another painful spank. Her face lit up and her mean expression turned into a begging one in the blink of an eye.
âPlease,â she said pitifully. âI need you.â
âOh, no, you hurt me with your words and Iâm still mad at you,â he said evenly. âAnd since youâre being punished,â he spanked her. âI think I wonât give in.â
Tears of frustration practically flowed from Hermioneâs brown-green eyes. They grew wide with desire and need. It gave her a desperate look. Harry found himself loving the sense of temporary power her desperation gave him.
Harry remembered that he had been originally put off by Courtneyâs suggestion about taking control every once in a while. But now that he had Hermione begging him for a shag, he made amental note to properly thank the Auror trainee.
âDamn it, Harry, take me right now!â Hermione demanded desperately.
âUmâŠâ Harry paused and pretended to mull over her request. âNo,â he said curtly and slapped her bright red bum.
Hermione shouted arather naughty word in disappointment.
âSuch harsh language,â reprimanded Harry, and gave her another swat which caused her to curse again. With another spank, Hermione buried her face in the bed sheets and growled loudly.
âOh, my poor bad little witch,â Harry playfully mocked as he gently rubbed her sore backside. âSheâs all dripping. My bad witch wants it bad. Doesnât she?â
Even though he could not see her face, Harry was positive that Hermione was rolling her eyes with annoyance at this question. With achuckle in his voice, he repeated the question. âThe naughty little witch wants it, doesnât she?â
To punctuate the fact that he wanted her to answer, Harry gave Hermioneâs left bum-cheek astrong squeeze.
âOh, yes give it to me,â Hermione said in a passionless voice. âMake me scream. Cum inside me. Blah. Blah. Blah.â
As punishment for not playing along, Harry gave her bottom three hard swats.
âOh, yes! Give it to me!â Hermione cried out, this time, very passionately.
Smiling like the cat that ate the canary, Harry said âNo.â
âHar-r-ry,â Hermione moaned pitifully. âGive it to me.â
âOkay,â Harry caved. âA little.â
âHow are you going to give me âa littleâ?â she asked, once again looking over her shoulder.
âLike this,â he answered and slid his hand down between her glowing cheeks. He pushed his middle finger into her sopping folds.
âOh,â she breathed out. âThatâs how.â
While he stimulated Hermione with his fingers, Harry kept his other hand busy by spanking her bum at random intervals. A few minutes and a fairly loud orgasm later, a very satisfied Hermione gasped for breath on Harryâs lap. Wriggling her tummy against his erection, Hermione purred âWe should take care of that.â
âThatâs a good idea,â Harry agreed. âIâm up for a blow job.â
âMy, arenât we all demanding tonight,â she said with a wicked smile.
âThere are better things to do with your mouth right now besides talking,â Harry stated impishly while pointing to the bulge in his pants.
âOkay, Iâll do it only if you keep talking to me like that,â she requested.
âDoes my naughty little witch want to give âHarry, Jr.â a tongue massage?â he asked.
âThatâll work,âHermione said and slipped off of Harryâs lap. She moved slowly and gingerly because of her obviously sore bum. With a pleasant hiss, Hermione knelt between Harryâs knees.
While Hermione tugged down Harryâs trousers, he asked âDid you want me to talk dirty in something like a play by play? You know, something like âThatâs it, free my willy and give it a kiss.'â
âWhatever you feel like saying, Harry,â she said with a twinkle in her eyes.
âOkay,â he smiled. âHow about the naughty little witch giving me a squeezeâŠâ
For the next few minutes, Hermione gave her lover a very energetic hummer. She seemed encouraged by Harryâs dirty comments, such as; âMy, you look awfully pretty with that in your mouthâ andâDo my balls feel good on your chin?â All the while, Hermione blushed furiously, clearly turned on by his efforts in dirty talk.
After he finished- and Hermione swallowed, Harry asked the heavens âWhat great deed did I do to get such a naughty witch as a present?â
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